Friday, June 17, 2011

Most Embarrassing Moment in Church

As I got ready for church I looked in the mirror and thought, “Well you’re lookin’ pretty good ole gal.”  Beautiful? Maybe not, pretty, yeah, I’ll settle for that. My black and white paisley skirt, black shirt and silver belt were looking sharp on my 5’2 and one half inch body. I looked as slim as pudgy
could get, which is what I strive for with every outfit I put on my body.

Once at church I went to Lifegroup, that’s the new word for Sunday School, and then stopped off by the restroom.  As I stood at the sink checking to make sure I still looked “pretty”, a few friends came in and we talked a few moments. One of those sweet ladies was an avid reader of my blog and she told me how much she enjoyed my posts. Ahh this was a good day so far….

As I sauntered toward the sanctuary passing a multitude of people (male and female) in the
hallway, confidence and joy exuded from me. It had been a great morning with study, family, and friends and I looked forward to a good sermon from the pastor.



But you know how it feels when you know someone is watching you? I kinda felt this way so I began adjusting my black shirt and as I walked a little further I noticed my leg felt strange. Cold,
drafty... I reached around to the back of my leg and discovered to my horror my skirt was caught up in my panties! Well, all I could do at that point was pull it out and keep going.  As much as I
wanted to I did not look back to see who might have seen my pink panties, my upper thigh and whatever else was hanging out back there.

Once seated in the huge sanctuary of a few thousand my mind began to race.

1-Who could have seen my display?

2-Why didn't my friends in the bathroom notice? Or did they...?  Were they really my friends?!

3- Thank goodness I decided not to wear my full Spanx underwear.

4- Thank goodness I don't wear thongs. It might have terrified the whole crowd.

5- Why didn't anyone tell me my skirt was neatly tucked in my underwear as I made my way down the hall?

I really didn't hear too much of the first part of the service. Actually I felt a little self-conscious wondering who, if anybody seated around me saw my butt. Off and on throughout the service my
thoughts went back to this "mishap". I hurriedly left the church after the service. There was no sauntering; no confidence, no joy, no feeling pretty, and the thought did run through my mind, “Pride comes before a fall, in my case pride comes before a “tuck”.

Written for a prompt from The Red Dress Club. Show us how physical beauty can open doors or close them.  How can it make a positive or negative  impact?

Hey stop by my other blog Gracefullwomen and read my newest post What Do Women Want. Don't you want to know?

17 comments:

Scarlett said...

Oh my goodness, I have DONE this. Except, not in church, my fumble was in front of the rest of my symphony before we took the stage. Thank GOODNESS one of my friends ran up behind me and pulled my dress out of my panties, or I would have stepped in front of a full house.

juliemooreonlife said...

Well I have to say that would have been a little more devastating. Thank goodness you had a friend there to help.

Carrie said...

how horrifying! How could no one TELL YOU?? Let's all pray no one saw and THAT is why :)

visiting from RDC

juliemooreonlife said...

Yep that's what I hope that no one saw my stuff.

Writerly Wanna Be said...

Surely someone would have told you...I am sure it wasn't seen! What a funny and wonderful story....glad you can laugh at yourself!

juliemooreonlife said...

Pretty sure a woman might have told me, not so sure a guy would have just because it would be uncomfortable. But yeah I can laugh now, my mind just went wild wondering if anyone saw anything. Thanks for your comments.

Lance said...

I think Jesus laughed with you, not at you. Hilarious story.

juliemooreonlife said...

I agree. He's laughed with me a million times.

Tina said...

Any man who saw you was struck dumb by the sheer beauty before him, is what I would say.

Great job putting me in the moment with you! That was some awesome describing!

juliemooreonlife said...

Ok I am your newest fan! Thank you for that generous compliment. And thanks for your kind crit.

Galit Breen said...

This? Is priceless!

Also- For sure, no one saw. So there- rest easy. :)

juliemooreonlife said...

Thanks Galit. Its the paranoid me that ran away with my thoughts that day. I'm back at church walking the halls with confidence again and making sure my clothes are int act.

May said...

Pride may come before the tuck as you say, but I am so impressed by your humility in the telling of this story. If it had happened to me, I would have been involved in a "cover-up" in all senses of the word!

Thanks for your beautiful comment on my post today. Really lovely words that meant a lot to me.

marcialoyd said...

I could relate to this story!! My skirt wasn't tucked in my panty hose but I had a HUGE rip right down the back of my skirt that NO ONE bothered to point out. I never discovered it until I got home that afternoon!

juliemooreonlife said...

Thats crazy that on one told you about that! The things we women go through to huh?

juliemooreonlife said...

It ws a story that had to be told, and it was funny. I love your writing May.

comingeast said...

I was right there with you, your description of the incident was so clear. Terrible incident, but great writing!